Change feels difficult for many of us! There are lots of reasons for this from overcoming resistance to poor yet convenient choices, allocating time for meal prep, exercise and some downtime for yourself.
One of perhaps the most challenging is finding support for your decision from those who are closest to you. Spouses, children and close friends as well as co-workers to name a few. I have heard a thousand times about how difficult this can be. The truth is almost everyone is invested in maintaining the status quo and would prefer that you did not rock the boat.
You may have heard some of the following non-supportive words, I don't like veggies mom, you're never around when I need you, hypnosis won't work (from the expert who has never tried it). You have been at this for two weeks and I don't see any change. On and on so you get the point.
Not so easy to be a Change Agent- someone who is determined to create change in their lives no matter what they are facing. It may even feel a little lonely, understandably so. Yet, what if there where people who shared your desire to create change and you just needed to find them?
This is something that I have put a good deal of thought into and I am offering some solutions. I created the Intentional Human Project as platform for this type of collaboration. Yes, that is the word not mere support but collaboration, in our Quest for change. One of the ways that I am reaching out is through workshops and events that are designed to bring people together who have an interest in personal and community growth. I am seeing that small group change is building and granted social media platforms are helping this occur. So please make an effort to connect with others who share your desire for creative activity. You are invited to join us in making a difference.
As of Tuesday next week the love of my life and I, will have completed the Whole 30. She can share her results personally as I will only share mine. I have to say the results are pretty amazing. First thing I noticed after about 4 days was my persistent cough was better. No dairy perhaps? At 10 days I was down about 7 lbs and at 15 the tiger blood started to kick in and I found myself running up and down the hall at work. No joke I am over sixty!
Was it easy to put everything in place so that my choices were the correct ones? Not really easy, yet not difficult. More and more grocery stores are carrying Whole 30 compliant foods and the above mentioned woman directed me to Pinterest, which I appreciated. Guys it's a whole new world!
So here's the next thing I discovered. Lot's of people do the Whole 30 as a detox or way of cleaning up their diets and feeling better. Then they slip back into their old habits until they decide to clean up again. Yes, some stay with it though I am curious percentage wise how many make it a lifestyle change. This is where I come in. I am putting together a simple program that utilizes Behavior Change Coaching, Hypnotherapy and Nutritional Health Coaching to help insure that real change occurs. Details coming soon! I will be announcing my final results next Tuesday and also talking about my visit to Orangetheory Fitness. My resolution for 2018 is to experience life to the fullest and to invite other to join with me. What's yours?
,Can you feel it? A feeling in your gut that tells you that you are ready. Ready for what, you ask yourself? I'm not sure though it feels kind of cool, like the feeling I used to have as a kid. You know just feeling curious and hopeful. I could imagine myself to be anybody or anything I wanted to and I never once heard an objection. I could fly to the moon and back and still get home for dinner. Camping in the backyard took me to the jungles of the amazon or the Himalayas.
So what went wrong? When did I lose the magic of a day filled with unlimited possibility? When did your sense of wonder vanish? For me it was not a specific day or event but a gradual slipping away until that feeling became pretty rare. It seems like I replaced this natural joy with an artificial joy that was dependent on something or many things that needed to align. It was usually related to some form of consumption or acquisition. Sometimes it was either alcohol or food induced. What I am calling joy is a very poor replacement and never really comes close. I am settling for a pretty poor consolation prize.
What's the pay off for acting this way, for going through life without feeling deeply, without expressing our true nature. When we discover this, we are stepping onto a path of profound change. If this idea sounds a little risky perhaps you are not as far from it as you think.
What if, the very thing that we used to reinforce our feelings of unworthiness were actually the path to a life well lived? What if, the solution was quite literally at our fingertips in the form of a reset button, how many of us would have the courage to push it? If it's that simple you ask, why not push the reset button? What could be the downside? Well it's kind a red pill, blue pill thing for those of us that have watched the Matrix". In the “Matrix” the main character, Neo, is approached by Morpheus who tells him everything he has ever seen or heard is not real and in order for him to know the truth about his world, he has to swallow the red pill in his right hand… or if he wishes to resume the illusion take the blue pill in his left hand. In my analogy the reset button is the red pill and we have to push it to change our reality- while the blue pill keeps us stuck in our current story. Of course you know there is more to this!
The reset button is important as it starts us on our Quest of awakening to our new story- to who we are and what we came here to do. Bottom line is that our non-productive behaviors patterns and associated thoughts are a symptom of entrapment in our own personal matrix- a form of distraction that keeps us from so much more. Clear Intention is the reset button that starts us on our Quest. The old thoughts and behaviors form a wall of resistance and it takes clear intention and resolute action to push past it. Start your Quest with my upcoming workshop on Intention Creation.
Now is the time to sit in deep refection and gratitude for all that has unfolded this past year. This is a gift of time that we must give ourselves! Perhaps the most important thing that we can give ourselves. In many cultures throughout history this time of the year was celebrated for just that. There is a tremendous impulse in our own country to get busy and get on with the new year. Often without any reflection on the past year or our current situation. Some of us can sense the error in this approach! Without a clear understanding of how our past actions have affected ourselves and others it's difficult to imagine that we will create something different in the new year. So we end up creating more of the same and wondering why we feel stuck.
The good news is that there is still time to set a course for the new year. Start with allowing yourself to feel deeply. No matter how your past year was whether joyful, painful or somewhere in between find something to be grateful for and start there. The smallest feeling of gratitude has the power to open us. Use this inroad to reflect on the year and if your harvest was poor ask what you might of done differently. No judgement just acceptance and compassion for yourself. It is this willingness to feel deeply that will clear the path to creating a strong intention for 2018. That is the next piece that we will be exploring.
About the Author
Behavior Change Coach and Author James Barfoot CHt holds certifications as a Master Practitioner of NLP and is a Clinical Hypnotherapist who is registered to practice in Washington State. He developed The Primal Toolbox a behavior change and coaching strategy based on a tribal models. James lives in Spokane WA.